Pay attention to what you pay attention to. Most people aren’t aware of what they are focused on because they are sleep walking through life so to speak, they live on auto-pilot. And, 70% of the time people are paying attention to what they are worried about, what they don’t like about themselves or their life and who or what has them upset.
Then there are those who know what they are paying attention to because it consumes them. They feel hurt, betrayed, fearful, worried, full of doubt, full of anger and just plain miserable. You know you should stop thinking about this but you can’t seem to stop yourself. And get clear on this: you are paying dearly for the attention you give to your problems!
When you focus solely on these limiting thoughts and hurtful feelings and you are consumed by them, how do you think you’re going to experience life? Worse yet, how are you infecting and affecting the people around you? You can let it ruin your health, steal your joy and cause you to miss out on so much.
The thing of it is it doesn’t have to be this way because you were born with the divine gift of your mind. You can either be the master of your mind or its servant. You can either choose to think about your problems or you can choose to think about your blessings. I could go on and on about the choices you have and how they impact your life.
But until you decide that you are no longer going to give all of your attention to what’s wrong in your life you will pay for that choice with sadness, fear, anger, more hurt, despair, heartache, depression, and misery.
So how do you stop it? You stop giving it your attention. You can’t think of two things at the same time so choose which one you are going to think about. What makes you happy or sad? What you’re afraid of or hopeful for? What you hate or love? What you want or what you don’t want? What you want to stop or what you want to start?
I hear this all of the time when working with people. They feel the way they do because they choose to think about what makes them feel bad! Think of where you are right now and where you want to go from here. Typically all that people think about is where they are right now. They jump in, wallow in it, swim around in it, sink further in and keep themselves stuck and then act like there is no way out!
When the reality is there is a way out and it all starts with you becoming the master of your mind. It all starts with what you choose to pay attention to.
Look, there is no question that things happen that can rock your world, that’s life. But once the earthquake is over you can either pick up the pieces and put your head back on straight or you can walk around in the emotional debris that you refuse to clean up.
We all make choices in life and if you want to choose to pay attention to what makes you feel bad, yet you want to be happy; you have to choose which is worth you giving your attention to. One is very costly to your happiness and the other causes happiness. So, pay attention! And choose!
Warmest wishes…HUGS! Susan
When thinking about when is enough, enough- you can apply the question to many areas of your life. Being that I talk to a lot of people dealing with many different “issues,” it typically comes down to the fact that whatever it is they’re dealing with they’ve had enough of it and they want it to go away.
When it gets bad enough is when you will begin to make some changes. Have you had enough heartache and pain? Are you tired of being in debt or overweight? Are you sick of putting up with the way someone treats you? Have you had enough of toxic people? Can you take another minute of putting yourself down? And, are you sick and tired of being sick and tired and you want to be happy?
When the pain of putting up with being miserable and continuing to do nothing about it becomes greater than the pain of the unknown, or stepping out of your box, or actually doing something to change.is when you will choose to end the madness that has you imprisoned.
The truth is you are the only one who has the key to unlock your cell door and free yourself from not getting whatever it is you want from life. It’s all about decisions, commitment, boundaries and actions. You make a decision about what it is you want to change. Then you commit yourself to doing what you need to do in order to experience what you want to experience.
Next, you either eliminate or set boundaries with the people who are toxic in your life, who suck your energy and who take advantage of you. If someone disrespects your needs, if they disregard your feelings or if they are only interested in one thing-themselves, what good is it to have them in your life?
I hear this a lot when discussing how one partner treats the other. They yell at them, talk down to them, they rarely validate their needs and they simply make them feel bad, most of the time. When you think about it, who else do you know that yells at you? Who do you hang out with that puts you down? And, how long would you be friends with someone who couldn’t care less about how you feel?
Typically the answer is no one else treats you like that and you would never put up with it from anyone else. There isn’t another person you know who actually treats you in this manner yet you put up with it from the one person that is supposed to love you more than anyone else!
If that’s the case, and if you want to be happy or have some self-respect, it’s called setting boundaries. Or, if need be it’s about making decisions that you’ve had enough and then do something about it, and that is called taking action.
Whether you’ve had enough debt, hurt, self-loathing or whatever it is that you’re done with, decide what you are willing to do about it. Love yourself enough to take care of yourself and make a commitment to take action to change it. What are you willing to do to have what you want?
Really think about that. What is it that you are willing to give up, who are you willing to let go of, what feelings and habits are you willing to let go of, what are you willing to commit to and what changes are you willing to make to be happy?
When you have the answers to those questions and you do something about it that will be the key that sets you free!
Warmest wishes always in all ways! Love Susan
Ah, the trio of limiting beliefs that can stop you in your tracks. They can wreak havoc on us at one time or another. One day you’re fine and the next day these insidious thoughts decide to sneak inside your brain, pull up a chair and have a party. And, they weren’t even invited!
They can ruin your day, add more stress and anxiety (as if you don’t have enough already), cause you to question what you are doing and why and they basically rain on your parade. They ignore the “No Trespassing” signs and trash your mental property. So how do you evict them from your mind?
You need to call in the L.B.B. – Limiting Belief Busters; Belief, Faith and Trust. You issue a warrant for their arrest and throw them in jail. Otherwise, you will be the one imprisoned as they run rampant in your domain with no way of catching them. The reality is, you allowed them to sneak in because you let the watch guard take a vacation.
Doubts, worries and fears have no more power than what you give them. And you feed them by acknowledging them, listening to them and letting them take over without putting up a fight. You own your mind and when something chooses to impinge on your happiness you have every right to knock it out.
These intruders don’t have a chance against belief, faith and trust. Invite them into your world and they will set you on the right path and protect you from sabotaging your peace of mind and harmony. It’s all about what you allow in.
When you are focused on the fear of something happening or not happening – you ignore Faith. When you worry that what you don’t want to happen will, you keep Trust on the outside looking in. And, when you doubt that you will ever have what you want, you kick Belief to the side of the curb.
Look, we all have doubts, fears and worries that knock on our door from time to time but it’s up to you whether you choose to entertain them or not. When you go to a buffet for dinner do you focus on what you don’t want to eat? Or, do you look at all the good things you can have?
It’s the same with your limiting thoughts and beliefs. If you focus on them, you will have a brain full of them causing you to be sick and tired. Instead fill your mind with faith, belief and trust that your divine source; call it God, your Higher Power or whatever, has your back and will provide you with exactly what you need.
If you choose to live in fear, have doubts and worry all the time there is no room for the goodness that is knocking at your door. So who are you inviting to your party?
Warmest wishes always…Love Susan
There are beliefs that are based on facts and then there are those that are based on fiction. But, the problem arises when we believe they are facts of life, we are so sure of the certainty of them being true that many times we make life altering decisions based on buying into these inaccurate beliefs.
The other problem is that more times than not we are making the wrong choices or should I say we are making different choices than we may have if we believed otherwise because we are being held hostage by the wrong beliefs or what are better know as limiting beliefs.
They are beliefs about ourselves, our circumstances and others that stop you from fully living the way you were meant to live. These kinds of beliefs can hold you back from becoming more successful, stop you from leaving unhappy relationships, cause you not to have confidence, make you your own worst critic and you can even end up defining who you become by these beliefs.
Let me give you an example of limiting beliefs that can cause you to walk down the wrong path. Sean is smart, intelligent and organized. He has been very successful in business but he’s tired of working for someone and he wants to start his own business. But he doesn’t. When asked why, his answer is: (by the way the limiting beliefs always comes out when asking the questions) What if I fail? I’m really not smart enough plus I’m getting too old to go out on my own.
Okay, so in this scenario, what are the limiting beliefs? What if I fail? What’s holding him back here is fear. What if he succeeds? Why believe the worst case scenario? Next, I’m not smart enough. Is that fact or fiction, true or false? The truth is he is smart enough but when you choose to believe you aren’t you don’t move forward, not to mention that I wonder how that makes him feel? And then last, I’m getting too old? What is too old?40-50-60-70-80?
I was going to give you several more examples but it would make the blog too long. So here is what you need to know. How do you identify your limiting beliefs? And how do you deal with them once you have them around their scrawny little necks.
First, you simply listen to yourself talk. How do you describe yourself and your life? Listen to the words you use. Then once you’ve identified the pesky little culprits that are putting a big damper on your journey through life you have to ask yourself these questions about these beliefs:
Is it true? What are the facts behind it? What might happen if I didn’t believe it? (Sometimes holding onto our beliefs is a way of protecting ourselves from something we are afraid of). What is the cost of holding onto this limiting belief? Who would I become if I didn’t believe this?
The fact is that many of our beliefs our engrained in us when we were younger and they weren’t based on truth. They may have simply been someone’s frustration blurting out untrue facts, such as, “You’re so stupid, or you’ll never be successful.” Or, someone unknowingly making statements that sticks with you (when they shouldn’t) such as: “She’s the shy one or he’s not very coordinated. Or, she doesn’t make friends easily”, etc.
Sadly it happens too often and 99% of the time people don’t deserve to hear these things that are said so nonchalantly but leave a lifetime impact on us. Then there are the beliefs you garner along the way through your own experiences of life and how it all unfolds for you.
Regardless if they’re old or new beliefs, get clear on the fact that they aren’t serving you very well. And also get clear on the fact that when you begin to dig down and dissect them what you will find is that you have been telling yourself things for years that perhaps simply aren’t true.
You deserve the truth. And you deserve to make life decisions based on solid facts instead of worn out lies that you’ve been mentally carrying around for way too long.
So dig out your Limiting Belief Detector and scan your mental glossary. Quarantine those thoughts and beliefs as they are the viruses that infect your life, they hold you back from experiencing what you are truly capable of and they put a huge damper on your fun factor in life. Are your beliefs fact or fiction?
As always, warmest wishes to discovering the real deal, YOU!
p.s. Leave your comments you know I love them and if you listened to the teleseminar let me know your thoughts!
p.s.s. I will send you a replay
Have you ever thought of yourself as an artist before? We all have talents in one form or another and believe me drawing is definitely not one of mine, but what I want to talk about is the art that you create with your words.
First it’s important to understand that your words have incredible creative power. Imagine your life as a piece of canvas and your words are the paint. The words you use to describe yourself, how you feel and what is going on in your world become splashes of paint on this canvas that represents a depiction of your life.
Uplifting, positive words are vibrant, bright colors that will adorn your work of art. Whereas, sad, fear-based, limiting words will be dark, drab hues that will be your palette. What does your canvas look like? Have you ever stopped and listened to the words you say throughout the day? Do you know what you sound like to others when they hear you talk?
If you started your day with a mini recorder taped on your shoulder and played it back at the end of the day you might be shocked and embarrassed at the words you use to describe yourself, talk about others and how much you complain about stuff that 99% of the time doesn’t really matter in the big scheme of things. Hitting the play-back button can really be a wake-up call to creating a better future.
Listen to other people’s words, what paints are they using to create their masterpiece? Words like: I’ll never be successful, I’m too old, too fat, too stupid, who will ever love me, I’m not worth it, no one cares, I hate my life, I’m sick of people, I’m a loser, I’m exhausted, I’m devastated, I’m worn out and on and on. These kinds of thoughts and words aren’t going to paint a pretty picture.
What people don’t understand is: it is the power within our words that creates how we live our lives. If you find yourself going down that poor-me-nothing-ever-goes-right path or you start moaning and complaining stop yourself. STOP being against yourself by putting yourself down. I challenge you to make 2012 the year you never say another negative thing about yourself again!
Instead, start your day by saying, Good morning beautiful, you wonderful, warm, fun person! Today is going to be a great day. Good things are in my life and I’m excited to see what happens next. Every day in every way I’m getting better and better!
After you pick yourself off the floor from the shock of being nice to yourself, your days might actually turn out better than usual. And the masterpiece you create with these words will rival Van Gogh!
It may not be easy at first because you are not used to painting your life with your words. But, once you begin to see that you have the power to choose your palette, to create a true work of art from your very own words, perhaps then you can begin to paint a real masterpiece which will be your life! You are an artist!
Warmest wishes to all of you, I’m excited to be back….leave your comments and have a beautifully painted weekend!
Susan
Well, having my site “revamped” has taken a little longer than I had anticipated but I’m finally back and I’m excited to be writing to you again. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
So another year, another new beginning. Did you know that researchers say that 40 -45% of adults make a New Year’s resolution and they’re typically about losing weight, to stop smoking, to start exercising and better money management? And, I read conflicting reports about what percentage are still on target to reach their goal after 6 months.
One report said, 44% were still on target and the other said only 8% who make a resolution actually reach it. Suffice it to say that a lot of people start out with good intentions but they simply don’t reach their goals. Why do you think that is?
My guess is that it’s because it’s hard. And who wants to change what they’ve been doing because obviously they’re getting some kind of pleasure out of it or they wouldn’t continue doing it, would they? Plus, it’s tough to change something that you know you should, but what you have to do in order to reach your goal or what you have to give up doesn’t seem to be worth it.
So what do you have to think or say to yourself that will make you one of the 8% that reaches your goal? You have to ask yourself, why? What is the reason that I want this change in my life? What is the feeling that accomplishing this change will bring to me?
When you have a defined “why” you can begin to focus on what you’re life will look like, feel like and be like when you’ve stopped smoking, when you’ve lost that weight, have a better job and when you have more control of your finances etc. Really see yourself as if you’ve already made it to the finish line. How does it feel?
Instead of focusing on how hard it is to change you now have an alternative focus to direct your mind each time you want to go down the it’s-too-hard-to-change path. And, you may even begin to realize that what’s so easy about being in a perpetual state of wanting.
If there is something you really do want to change, the best thing to do after you have figured out what your “why” is- is to make a plan. What is your strategy to get to where you want to be? Get out a piece of paper and make a plan. Start with the month of Jan. 2012 and make blocks to Jan. 2013 and then write out your plan. Make it an outline. Determine what your plan of attack is for each milestone and keep it where you can look at it everyday.
The truth is that you have an untapped strength within you to do the thing you think you can’t. But with no plan and no course of action you are less likely to even find that strength to accomplish your goals since you won’t need it.
Another great place to begin is to appreciate all that you do have. Don’t wait to be happy. Make a mental list of how incredible your life is and find pleasure in the simple things. If you want to change something in your life, that’s fine. But, the last thing you want to do is postpone your happiness until you reach your goal.
NOW is the time to be happy and it will make the journey to where you’re going much more pleasurable along the way.
Wishing you all a blessed New Year filled with love, peace, abundance and whatever your heart desires.
With much love….. Susan
And also, I want to thank you so much for your prayers for my mom, she is doing better. Thank you!
P.S. I didn’t forget about the teleseminar on The Laws of Attraction. I just need to set it up with my conference line.
I was recently asked what I thought about the Law of Attraction, and I said, “Here’s what I think about it, I wrote a book about it”! Some people may have never heard of it, some may not care about it, and some may know about it but they don’t believe it. Then there are the ones that have heard about it and want to know more and those who have tried it and it didn’t work.
I not only believe it. I lived it and I know anyone else can too. Regardless of who you are, how old you are, where you come from, where you’ve been and where you want to go, ANYONE can learn the Laws of Attraction and then implement these Laws into their lives if they really want to see significant changes in any area of their life.
When I was first learning about these Laws I had my doubts. I thought, can this really all be true? Is it possible that this can really work? And, after reading volumes of books and doing extensive research I didn’t think it was true, I began to believe, without a doubt, that it was 100% true? The more I read the more I was excited that I now had the keys that could actually change my life. And I did!
I changed where I lived, I changed careers and I changed my income. I built a new home, went into a field I knew nothing about and succeeded. And I made more money than I ever had before. A year before learning these Laws, if you had asked me where I would be a year from now, I would say, I’d be in the same place doing the same thing, because I like so many people quit dreaming a long time ago.
These are the Laws of the Universe and they are as real as scientific laws, such as the Law of Gravity. And these Laws affect everyone, whether you believe them or not. There are several Laws within the Laws of Attraction that I can get into down the road.
The main premise is that everything in our universe is made up of energy, and this energy vibrates at a certain frequency, even our thoughts, words and feelings have a vibration attached to them and what you send out into the universe via your thoughts, words and feelings (their vibrational level) are like a magnet and they will attract back to you a like or equal experience, situation or event to match the level of your vibration, your energy.
I just had a thought. If you would be interested I can set up a teleseminar to explain the Laws or what I call the Keys in my book. I so appreciate all of your support and loyalty. Many have been with me for years and I would love to give you something back. I won’t charge you a dime, It will be free!
Let me know if this is something you would be interested in either by email or in the below comments and I’ll put it together. A lot of this information is what I use when coaching people who have made significant changes in their life when they didn’t believe it possible before.
Now back to the Law of Attraction. When you think about, speak about or feel things like, worry, fear, anger, jealousy, sadness, despair, etc. These kinds of thoughts are packed full of a limiting, low vibration crap that you are throwing out into the universe and guess what you are attracting? More worry, fear, anger, jealousy, sadness etc.
What you think about everyday, what you talk to your friends and family about and whatever it is you keep your mind focused on you will attract into your life. Whether it’s debt, not having enough money, not ever meeting anyone, being stuck forever in your job, a bad relationship, never losing weight or whatever it is; it is what you will bring into your life through your very own doing or emitting.
One of the main Keys in creating your own life, your own reality through a focused, open and expectant space is, you learn how to think on purpose instead of by habit. You decide what your intention is and you raise your level of vibration through changing limiting thoughts, words and feelings to those that will vibrate at a higher level and therefore bring about the kinds of experiences you want, not the ones you don’t want.
So, think about what you think about. Better yet, think about how you feel because how you feel is a telltale sign as to what you are thinking. If you feel good, then think on thinking that, if you feel bad it’s time to look at your beliefs and why you are choosing to walk down a road that will never bring you what you desire!
Hope you have a wonderful weekend with lot’s of love and laughter! Susan
p.s. don’t forget to let me know if you want to jump on a free call about the Keys that will unlock your power!
I was compelled to write this after a comment I received. I mentioned in my last blog that we should be grateful for many things that we take for granted, that ability to walk, talk and see, our health and people we love etc. I couldn’t possibly list them all!
I would never want to make anyone feel bad for any reason so I wanted to apologize if this came across the wrong way.
We all have disabilities in our lives but that doesn’t mean that we can’t go on to have a great life. We can overcome our struggles regardless of what they are.
There are people who have physical disabilities that you can see with your eyes. And, then there are disabilities that you can’t see on the outside. But what goes on inside of a person can be debilitating to fully living a life with joy, peace and happiness.
Some people may be able to walk but they go nowhere because they are crippled by their fears. Some people can see but they are blinded by their emotions and beliefs. Some people can hear, but they never really listen.
And then there are people who may be blind but they can see the beauty that shines from the soul. They may not be able to hear but in their silence they are closer to God. They may not be able to walk but they are further in their spiritual journey than many.
It is when we overcome our disabilities, when we struggle through our impairments and come through our adversities; that it not only makes us become are true authentic self, but once we move beyond what imprisons us, whether seen or unseen, that is the light within that shines the way on our path in life.
So, I try and keep my mind focused on my blessings to make my struggles less powerful. I try and stay in a place of being thankful when I want to moan and complain and I try and be a light to others when they feel darkness surrounds them.
We all have our dis-abilities, but once conquered, it gives us the ability to fully live, laugh and love!
I love you all and wish you the very best on your journey! Susan
For those of us who live in the U.S. today is the day to give thanks for all of our blessings. Think about all of the people who have made a difference in your life and be thankful for them. Whether good or bad, all of our experiences groom who we become. Be grateful because without them you wouldn’t be you.
Think about all of the many gifts you’ve been given that you may take for granted each day. Start with your body. Your ability to see, hear, walk and talk. Be thankful for every functioning organ in your body. I know it sounds trivial but if you were on kidney dialysis or waiting for a liver transplant you might feel differently.
I just heard on the news last night that some people are so excited about Thanksgiving dinner but they can’t swallow. They are in therapy to re-learn how to! Be grateful you don’t have to think twice about enjoying your Thanksgiving dinner.
Be thankful for the people you love and who love you back. Without them your world will be different. And, now is the time to enjoy them, honor them and celebrate them by letting them know how much they mean to you.
Think about all the people who need love, who suffer and who don’t know where to go and what to do. Pray for them and if you can somehow make a difference; to them you will become their blessing.
Yes, today is the big day to be thankful, to reflect on all of our blessings and to come together as a family. The world is your family so fill it with love, kindness and gratitude. Not just for today, but start every day giving thanks and see what a difference it can make in your attitude.
When you really appreciate everyone and everything in your life your problems become smaller, things don’t seem as bad and when you come from an attitude of gratitude you will attract more goodness into your life.
As the Christian mystic, Meister Eckhart says, “If the only prayer you ever say is “thank you” that would suffice.”
Warmest wishes for a blessed Thanksgiving Day with your loved ones and for those of you who don’t live here…you can start your own tradition of giving thanks! Enjoy Love…Susan
p.s. I can’t wait for the mashed potatoes and gravy!!!!
I’m often asked, how do I change, how can I get myself out of this rut and pick up the pieces of my life? For those of you who have read my book, The 7 Keys to Unlock the Power Within You, you know that out of all the necessary steps you take in order to implement change, the one that has the greatest impact on change is your thoughts.
What you allow your mind to think about, dwell on, obsess over and consume yourself with is what you will attract to yourself. The thoughts you use to describe who you are, how you are and how you feel will ultimately become your reality.
Your thoughts are like little magnets that you throw out into the universe and they will attract back experiences and feelings that match what you throw out there. So if you are thinking limiting, negative, fear based or sad types of thoughts, the vibration from them will attract a like vibration and in turn manifest itself into an equal experience.
The universe will respond to what you put out there. It doesn’t monitor whether it’s good or bad, positive or negative; it will simply do what it does naturally and give you whatever it is you’re focused on. That’s why it’s a good idea to learn how to get in tune with the tape that is playing in your brain.
At first it’s not so easy to train yourself to flip-the-script since you’ve pretty much been on auto-pilot most of your life. Half the time you don’t even know you’re thinking and the other half you may wish you were thinking of something other than the same old stuff that may be dragging you down.
But get very clear on one thing, whatever it is that you choose to think about you are attracting into your life!
The easiest way to get in tune with that inner dialogue is to ask yourself, “How am I feeling right now?” Do you feel good or bad, happy or sad, hopeful or fearful? Use your feelings as a barometer as to whether you are walking down the “right” or “wrong” thinking path.
It’s the very thoughts you think that are causing you to feel the way you do. So, once you get in tune with how you feel you will understand more clearly that you feel this way because of what you are thinking. And then, you can look at those thoughts and decide if they serve you well or if they need to be changed to those that will empower you instead.
If you learn this one key to making changes in your life the impact will seem like magic to you. You will suddenly see things in a new light. You will see things from the positive side, the side that fills you with gratitude and hopefulness. The side that’s the better side of the bed to get up on!
So begin today and think about what you are thinking about. Learn the concept that thoughts are things that have a vibrational equivalent that shows up in your life; as your life.
If you can choose what you think about why wouldn’t you choose to think about what you want instead of what you don’t want?
Wishing you a wonderful weekend enjoying all your blessings! Love…Susan
The last 2 years have been a struggle, but with your encouragement and words of wisdom, it has helped me no end. Thank you x
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